A manager, Julie, fumed as she told me about asking one of her new employees to evaluate vendor alternatives for an upcoming project and getting a report that ignored the criteria Julie considered "obviously most important."
Julie isn't alone in asking for A and getting B. But why does this happen? The natural reaction is to find fault with the employee: He should know better; she wasn’t paying attention. But if this has happened to you, maybe the problem is the way you gave the instructions. This is the “curse of knowledge"; once you know something, it's difficult to imagine how it appears to someone who doesn't know.
So, what to do? Well, maybe you gave a bunch of instructions in one big lump, so that it all blurred together. Dividing the lump into logical chunks makes it easier for the other person to absorb and remember essential details. And give them in the right sequence; in some situations, the wrong sequence can be catastrophic (even if amusing, as in the case of this video clip). Using words like "first," "next," "then," and "finally" can help clarify the sequence.
Furthermore, don't expect the person you're instructing to know the who-what-where-when-how-why of your request. How could Julie's employee, being new, know the criteria Julie considered most important? But even seasoned employees might benefit from additional direction. If any aspect of your request is critical to the results you're seeking, state it precisely. Be specific about the specifics. Strive to minimize ambiguities. And give examples. Refer to other situations, formats, styles, or experiences that illustrate what you have in mind, as well as examples of what you don't want.
Two things instructions often omit are anticipation and failure. Anticipation refers to how to prepare for the task and what difficulties might be encountered along the way. Failure refers to how to know you've blown it and need to back up, start over, or give up.
It's wise to seek feedback as you proceed. Stop periodically and ask, "Are you with me?" Of course, some people fear admitting they don't understand—or they don't realize they don't understand—so it may be useful to have the person restate the instructions. If you're concerned about appearing condescending, simply explain that you want to be sure you didn't omit anything.
Whatever you do, don't interpret silence as understanding. The absence of questions may signal perfect understanding—or it may be a sign of someone so confused, he doesn’t know what to ask. If you're not sure which is the case, ask some questions to verify the person's understanding.
These suggestions would be overkill if you were simply asking a coworker to get you an egg salad sandwich when he goes to the cafeteria. But for important matters, it's just as easy to give clear, well-stated instructions as vague, ambiguous instructions, and you're likely to be happier with the results if you do the former—especially if you like getting what you want the first time around.
